Expert Spotlight: Rebekah Buege

The Three Qualities of a Woman Who Loves Her Body

Why does it seem like some women radiate confidence? It feels like they’re just born with this sense of who they are, while everyone else is left searching for validation from strangers on the internet.

Body confidence isn’t something you’re born with, thank God. After helping former fitness competitors and health influencers, I can tell you confidence doesn’t come as a result of having your “goal body” either. Loving your body is a commitment you choose every day. It takes intention and effort, but also an important perspective shift overlooked in our culture.

The women who come to mind when you think, “I wish I could be that confident,” aren’t part of an exclusive club. They’re actively building these qualities so they love their body even though it’s not perfect - and so can you.

Here are three qualities of a woman who loves her body.

Patience

Before you know if you love your body, you need to define what love actually is. One thing I learned after a toxic relationship is that love isn’t defined the same by everyone. So I found a consistently accepted definition of what love looks like in action. The main theme I found is love is patient.

Women who love their body are patient with it. They understand it’s not going to look exactly how they want. Patience allows time and space for change with acceptance and support along the way. If you’re struggling to love your body, practice some patience.

Perspective of care

Love isn’t a journey towards perfection. Love is a journey of care. When you love something, you naturally care for it. It brings you joy to care for people, things, and causes you love. It’s the same with your body.

Women who love their body take on a perspective of care. I’m not talking about “self care” that’s actually thinly veiled diet culture and reinforcing beauty standards. 

Caring for your body includes physical care like hygiene, nutrition, activity, wearing clothes that fit well, etc. Don’t forget the importance of emotional care like thinking well of yourself, defending your body from negative comments, and not comparing your body to other people.

Cultural awareness

Loving your body involves protecting your thoughts from critical beliefs. The highest form of social currency a woman can carry in our culture is a body that fits the current beauty standard. Women are primarily valued by their beauty. Which is why there’s a constant, subliminal attack on your body confidence as a woman. There’s too much banking on your insecurity for the diet, beauty, and fashion industry to go down without a fight. We see it everywhere.

Women who love their body are highly aware of how easily culture sabotages this relationship. Awareness allows them to filter these messages and hold onto what’s true. The truth is their body is one part of who they are - and it’s far from the most important.

Women who love their body know their body’s purpose is not to look good. Their body gives them the ability to fully experience life by enjoyment, self expression, and connection. Valuing that purpose above what culture values is the strongest position to take in the fight against insecurity.

Want to learn more about social currency and how culture is influencing your body confidence? Get your pre-order of my book, Social Currency: the truth about beauty and confidence in a culture obsessed with perfection. Pre-orders (at a discounted rate) are available from August 1-31st. Ordering multiple copies qualifies you for bonuses like personalized voice notes, access to my signature body confidence course, and even private coaching.

With love + encouragement,

Rebekah

(One of Marigold’s Confidence Coaches)